Sunday, May 15, 2011

The Cocktail Incident

Or "Just Another Reason Why Toddlers Need to Sit in High Chairs at a Restaurant,

Instead of Booster Seats."

Follow me on this journey...

After a fun, slightly drizzly after-hours event at the Nashville Zoo, the families K and M decided to rest their weary bums at the Roadhouse of Logan's. The odd happenings at the zoo earlier in the evening had been explained away by late feeding times, but Mama M would soon come to believe that those animals were foretelling of strange events to come. Beautiful macaws don't just fight; zebras in captivity don't find the joy to run free about their enclosure in a spritely manner; flamingos don't walk up to zoo members looking for food, only to find they have a camera in hand and then take their picture with said camera.

No...something strange was in the air in Nashville...and only the animals knew what the families were in for...

When the host of the restaurant offered immediate seating, the families were relieved to have no waiting time. Although they had requested high chairs, this table could not accommodate the chairs, but booster seats could be used in its place. The host insisted that the children would not be able to get out of the seats, and Mama M thought to herself, "Getting out is not the issue - sliding down into the abyss under the table and knocking teeth out on the way down is." But, they decided to try it out. The families K and M were welcome to the challenge. Fools. This would be interesting.

If only they had listened to the animals...

Baby K decided the booster seat was not for him. And that was that. Baby M tried it out, but as Mama M had thought; he kept sliding down and out of the seat. To prevent busting of his chin or chipping of his teeth, because nobody likes to see blood at a table for dining, Papa M made the decision to remove the booster seat from under Baby M's bum. Thus began the standing and walking and looking out the window at cars passing by.

When the waitress took the orders for the table, the family M ordered their dinner, as they had not yet eaten. The family K was just going to order dessert, as they had eaten some type of wild fare at the zoo for dinner. The waitress took Mama K's order, Baby K's order, took their menus and walked away without getting Papa K's order. Papa K and the rest of his tablemates were stunned! How could she forget to take an adult's order? What was she thinking? Mama K and the family M tried to get him to stop her and mention it, but he was oddly cool.

Had the zoo fare prepared him for the disasters the Roadhouse of Logan's had in store?

After the family M and two-thirds of the family K enjoyed their food (Papa K filled up on peanuts - anyone sense an odd elephant-type kinship here?), they sat around talking and laughing about the evening, their children and themselves. Who doesn't enjoy a good laugh? Most of the dishes had been cleared away by their ever-observant waitress, and they were just talking the night away. Baby M had a pee-pee incident, and Baby K almost had a puke incident. Good times with good friends.

But, then the coup de gras...

Baby M spotted a small bowl of cocktail sauce that had come with Mama M's food, but that she hadn't touched, because she thinks it reeks of ickiness. He must have thought to himself, "What isn't there to love? It's a pretty red color, in a nice white bowl." And in that thought, he reached over Mama M, grabbed the bowl and proceeded to shake it up and around the two of them. Mama M tried to shield herself from the stinky sauce, but to no avail. Drops landed on her shirt, right where she could smell them all the way home.

Baby M had quite a bit more sauce on him. A large glop landed smack on his forehead in the area above his left eye and all over his shirt and hands. The moment the sauce landed, both the families K and M were stunned for about a second. Baby M seemed frozen, as if he had thought the red stuff in the bowl were just a bit more solid than it turned out. Then, the laughter erupted, and the clean-up began.

And thus, became the story of why toddlers need to sit in high chairs at a restaurant, instead of booster seats.

*Note - No zoo animals were harmed in the writing of this story*

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